What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

I had an Anti-joke but i forgot it.

r u smart..... or ur black

How come grilled cheese?

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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