Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Once upon a time there was man named Bob. He liked bacon. So he ate some. And he like it. So he got some more and ate it. Then he went an played THE GAME.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get pikachu on a bus? Rape his wife and point a gun to his head and tell him that he'd better get on the damn bus before you shoot him. Btw sorry if I just double posted. I am on an iPad at school.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I'm gonna say something that is going to blow you(away). My Rape Dungeon has carpet.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's wrong with a black man in a bar? Nothing, Except the fact that he is an alcoholic, and will probably beat his wife after drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Wigan.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Person 1: I have one question: What are those?!?!?!?!?! Person 2 : Their shoes you Dimwit. Person 1: (runs away crying) -by Mekkhi

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops