What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +35

kevin kim

thumb_up thumb_down +33

You’re so dumb that many individuals find your intelligence inferior.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the man without a tongue say...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A kid goes to Band Camp and comes back better at the Trumpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

GADZOOKS!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops