roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

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i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What's funnier than 68? Will ferrel

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

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What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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Justin Bieber got laid

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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I pooped.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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What is black and red? Something that is black and red.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops