What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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The Olympics

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Hi

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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Get in the car.

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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Yes.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Miley Cyrus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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