What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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how many pancakes does it take to get fat if u answered this question your already fat

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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Your biggest fan.

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The government

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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