Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

squirrels with massive bonerss

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

thumb_up thumb_down +10

jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Look how far I can kick this bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An English man walks into a pub.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops