What did the man without a tongue say...

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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Whats an Anti Joke

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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Neither does he.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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How many women does it take to drive a car? One. She had a sex change.

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civil rights

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Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

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Mark Wilson

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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