A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

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GADZOOKS!

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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Why can't T-rex give hih fives, Because they're dead...

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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women's rights.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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