Why Do Girls Have holes?? For the guys poles.

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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what do you call a young man? a little boy

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Q What did the Whale say to the Giraffe? A Why are you in the ocean?

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

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Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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NOTICE: If you have noticed this notice then you will have noticed this notice is not worth being noticed

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What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

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Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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69

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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