Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Dont look at me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops