What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -120

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops