A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

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what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

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Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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what do you call jerry sandusky with a kid in a shower jerry sandusky

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Poop swing

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So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops