I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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A gay Asian guy walks into a gay bar where he found a fruity looking black man... The Asian went up to the black man and said, " how'r they hanging?" shocked with anger, the black man hits him in the face, knocks him to the ground and said, " YOU DO NOT TALK TO MY FAMILY THAT WAY. BOTH MY GRANPARENTS WERE LYNCHED!!!" the Asian stands up and brushes himself off... He turns to the black guy and says " I meant the balance scale at the table you were were sitting at" the black fellow turns to the table with the notebook and the balance scale with rocks on both sides that he was sitting at... He turns back to the Asian man and apologizes for his rude behavior and buys him a drink... (2 hours later) they have sex

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Priority parking for hybrid cars

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

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When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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e4ryka mcgyuire rode stephanie sinnott

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Chuck norris

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A cop

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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knock knock who's there?

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Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

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Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

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Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

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What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

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Why did it die Nothing died

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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