What did the heart attack victim say? Call 911, I'm having chest pains. yeah, your anti-jokes are this funny....

Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I said so.

Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

Have you ever listened to the smell of the color 9? It tastes like freedom!

Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

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Obama

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

a horse walks into a blender ow

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farm he was from was near a road. There was a hole in the fence and the chicken got out. He then started wandering and happened to cross the road.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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