Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

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What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

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what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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