Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

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What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

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fruit salad?

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Why was the American patriot sad that Bin-Laden was killed? Because he wanted to take him back to America to touture him.

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general tso's broccoli

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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Where's my baby??

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

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What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

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A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

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knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

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Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

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They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

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What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

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You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops