How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

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what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

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I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

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Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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What's a Guy Gotta Do? -Usher

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A black guy bought fried chicken and grape soda and decided to eat in the park. He had a sip of the grape soda and said "aaaaaaahhh grape drank!" There was a man dressed in a grape coustume drinking out of the fountain.

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

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my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

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I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

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Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

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Guy #1: Knock knock Guy #2: Whos there? Guy #1: Interrupting murderer Guy #2: Interrupting murd.... Guy #1: STAB!!!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a Nazi.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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why is 6 afraid of 7 its not, they actually have a domestic partnership going

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Why did the boy sharpen his pencil it was dull

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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