Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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If Jim lives in north carolina, what does that make his dad's brother? Black

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Five men walk into a bar. The bartender says, more taste or less? None of them care.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

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Have you seen the 6th sense? Nope, is it good? Yeah Bruce Willis is dead

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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whats long and stretchy? elastic

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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They say those with anti-humour are the wisest.

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Whats so funny? That kid has down syndrome

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if life thows you lemons ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

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What did the alcoholic say to his priest? I'm Drunk. The priest says "Your drunk go home". He barely makes it.

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

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how many blondes did it take to fix a nuclear reactor? 1 she was a black japanese rapist

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

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how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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