I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

thumb_up thumb_down -2

O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

bees knees

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"who you calling pinhead" tell me you know what thats off

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a person with no legs and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops