What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Whats worse than 1 bee sting... 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings... The hollacaust Whats worse than the hollacaust... 3 BEE STINGS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

whats up fuch you bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -44

How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

thumb_up thumb_down -86

whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

thumb_up thumb_down +57

planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

thumb_up thumb_down +41

3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops