A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

Hi

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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