What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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When a suicide-bomber went to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

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How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

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What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

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What do you call an Oliver with friends? A dream

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Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

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I was born.

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

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Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

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What is a black man's favorite fast food restauraunt? Varies.

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What do Kim Kardashian and a broken-down horse have in common? They will both eat oats out of your hand.

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GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Yo momma is so fat that her cholesterol level is above 240 mg/dL and should highly consider a vegan diet if she wishes to improve.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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