A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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No.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

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I like dogs. Lots of dogs. Meow.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Which is longer? A rope...

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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Okay, an ambulance is arriving for me (cops called it whatever I am fine) If you are still reading this then get the fuck out before I fire you no more messages.

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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What comes after 23? 24.

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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