I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What time is it? 20:45.

A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

im a dragon, no im not

How old are you like 10? Im 11 so shut the fuck up

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...