There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

women's rights

What's the difference between a nickel and a dime? Five cents.

penis

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

What happened after the man walked off the cliff? Nothing. It was a foot tall.

yo mama is so fat even dora cant explore her

What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

What do you call a black cop? Officer.

Roses are red, Violets are purple, nothing rhymes with purple.

A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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