A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

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Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Q: What did the chinese guy say to his friend? A: ??

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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You want to hear a joke. Sure. A black president. Oh wait...

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

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A moose walks into a grocery store. It goes up to the clerk and asks, "do you guys have any potatoes?" the clerk replies oh yeah they're in isle... Ooooh wait a second. You're a moose. The moose responds, "Yes, indeed I am." The clerk then says "Oh ok, isle seven."

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when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

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what do you call a man with no legs? An ambulance as he seem to be bleeding very heavily.

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Your mama is so fat that when she farted she called it global warming

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Never mind

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What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

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What do you call a bear with no fur? A taco.

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Why do girls not have to have drivers license? Because they don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen ;) Don't mean to offend anybody! His joke is just funny

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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How to make Ramen like a boss Step 1: get a promotion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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