Pokemon go: Team mystic

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Why didn't the caterpillar turn into a butterfly? Because it was a cheeto

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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George Bush, a little boy, and his grandfather are on an airplane with a failing engine. They have only two parachutes to save themselves. The plane crashes and they all die.

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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Penis.

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

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Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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