What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

4 is half the number 8 is.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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