sexual intercourse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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