Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

thumb_up thumb_down -36

We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

thumb_up thumb_down -38

knock knock who's there me i kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

thumb_up thumb_down -44

whats up fuch you bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +57

a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

thumb_up thumb_down +51

How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down +43

whats 2+2? math.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops