A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

Howdid we get copper piping we put a Pennie between two Jules

Andy Carrol

Ill do a lot more than just try you, anyways, technically I learned to play the piano as a kid, but now I play on a small cheap keyboard (the musical kind) and sincerely, I kinda suck at it now, my abusive parents expected perfection beat the shit out of me blahblahblah, thats really all of it, trauma. My senses, well, when I was a kid I was terrified of gravity (one of the rarest fears in the world) because I had no idea I was consciously shifting things myself. So lets say... If I somehow end up hanging upside down, I just shift it, so my brain believes I am not and I experience no discomfort, there is a lot more to it, ill tell you, damn nose wont stop bleeding and my waifu got a bit scared, she got some bad bronchitis and she still has not recovered a 100 percent, but its just the cough now though... Lets just say that my ability to balance, is about 300-500 percent higher than any regular human, and that I can stand on one leg enough to beat the guiness record book 50 times... ...IIIIF I was in good shape, which I am not.

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

FIONN'S LIFE

SCENES WHEN TOM O'SHEA GETS STABBED IN PRISON AFTER STEALING THE WHEELS OFF AN AMBULANCE

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

HI MY NAME IS DOUG

Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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