How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

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What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

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What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

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Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

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If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

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Do you like fishsticks No

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

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have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops