Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

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A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Justin Bieber got laid

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Why couldn't the black guy enter the room? He was too large to fit through the doorway therefore he turned around and left

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What did the boy say during his math test? Nothing, talking during a test is prohibited.

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What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

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Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

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Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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Womens Rights

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7

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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