Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

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Show me the money! Said the man last wednesday.

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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whats good about poland... fukk all

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What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

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Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

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Knock Knock. Go Away!

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What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

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Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

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A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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