How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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im black

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Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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No.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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PSN IS UP

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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