If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock, Knock Why did you just say knock knock?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the man scream? because he was run over.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

25

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

yo mama's so fat, she wears a big belt

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's funnier than 68 69

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A white man on his way to happens to sit next to a black man the following conversation involves a democrat and a repuplican arguing about obama's current presidentcy and the wallstreet journal the two do not agree on both sujects and part ways...the white man is later brutally murdered in his own house infront of white and children in an unrelated incident. We should all help to stop violence in our local nieghborhoods.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

An ordinary man, much like your friend Brad from that one place where you used to hang out, was walking along one night, much like that night last week, and saw a star. He then wished upon that star...and kept walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops