Did you hear about the guys who wanted to go to Hawaii??? They didn't go!

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

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What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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have you seen Stevie Wonders house? Nope. oh well sorry for bothering you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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