What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

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Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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