- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

What's black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

7

Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

hi bye

How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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