How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

whats 2+2? math.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

tight butthole 4 lyfe.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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