Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

Why did the child cross the road? Her parents were abusing her and she wanted to get hit by a car.

Your mom.

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...