Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you have if you have 100 rabbits in a row and 99 step back? That would be a very unlikely thing to happen, unless a mildly scary predator was released in front of them, or they weren't all stepping back at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's fourteen inches long and purple and can make a woman scream all night? crib death

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the car do? CRASH!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Can a nine iron? No, but a tucan.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock, knock whos there child molestor

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops