Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

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What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

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What did the indian man say to the black man? "Hi."

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The Game

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

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How is an orange like an airplane? They both have wings except an orange doesn't have wings

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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What's the difference between you and yourself? Yourself has 4 more letter in it.

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

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What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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A midget walks under a bar

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops