What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

Jesus was a good guy

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

Brad Fuller!

Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

nipple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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