Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

400 asian people walked in a bar

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

69

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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