Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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