Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

Why did the white girl fuck the mexican? Because her teacher told her to do an "essay"

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

Woman's rights

penis

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

Why did the man stop having seizure? Because his condition was recognized and he was properly medicated.

- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

Black Friday

Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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