Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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What do you call a mother who is also your aunt and a father who is also your uncle? Incest

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

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Whats the greatest part of buttsex the refrigerators

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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Why did annie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Annie!

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donald................duck for president

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A person expresses their opinion online. Another person thanks them for sharing their opinion but kindly disagrees, then he wishes the other person to have a good day.

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What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Your mom.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

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Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it taste good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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