Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

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How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller have a baby? A: Because she is dead. ...I IS HORNY!

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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I walked into my maths lesson and my teacher told me to point out the uncommon variable. ..So i pointed at the ginger black man in the corner.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

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Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Grammer is very important

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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