So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

A horse walks into a bar, but is kicked out because animals are not allowed in that bar.

If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

What happened to Liam? He Died.

Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

i have to pee out my ass.

How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

The person below me is weird.

What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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